An Open Apology

 I think I ruined someone's life. There was this one girl in my high school who I wasn't really friends with. I know very little about her to this day, if I'm being honest. What I do know is that she dated a guy who was a total jerk but for some reason we all liked him anyway. I know that she broke up with him. I don't know why. And I know that everyone in our school saw a photo of her topless because her boyfriend spread it around after she dumped him. I remember a friend forwarding me the photo. I remember forwarding it to another friend, saying something like, "can you believe this whore?" I don't know why I did that. Maybe I didn't think that that friend would send it to someone else even though that's exactly what I did and my first friend did. It seemed like the harm was already done and I couldn't make the situation worse. But I did. We all did. Every single person that looked at it and showed it to someone else made it so much worse. 
I didn't know back that exactly what was wrong with this situation. Like, I just thought this is what happens when you trust a guy with such an intimate photo. But he violated her consent by doing this. And every single one of us violated her consent again and again by spreading it around. It's been about 9 years and I'm only just now realizing my part in it all. I read an earlier story about celebrity leaked photos and all of these memories started flooding back. I've always known that violating consent is wrong. But I didn't know that I violated someone's consent. I wasn't just a witness of this horrible violation. I actively participated. 
For the longest time, I thought violating consent meant being raped. No one ever told me anything about all of this. Maybe if I had known I wouldn't have participated or maybe I would have helped this girl. And now I don't know if there's anything I can do to make what I did okay. I don't think there is. 
I've checked her Facebook ten times today. She seems to be okay now. She just got engaged. She looks happy. Her life didn't get ruined over this. But it could have. And I've been struggling on how to reach out to her or if I even should. I want to apologize. But I don't know if she'd even want to hear from one of the people who hurt her like that. 
To the girl who I hurt and to anyone that's been through what she did, I have to say I'm sorry. I don't have a clue what it feels like to have such a private moment violated by so many people. If I had known what I was going to do to you, I wouldn't have done it. And, I'm so thankful that you ended up okay. You're stronger than I would have been. And I've read so many stories like yours that didn't have a happy ending. I hope your ending is the happiest. You deserve so much better than what you were given.